Well today was certainly one full of emotion and disappointment. There is really no reason to hide it so I will just go ahead say that I lost my job today. I can't say that I am surprised but it still hurts. I tried so hard to make it back. I worked extra hard at speech therapy and physical therapy but it is over. I can still receive my disability benefits so that is not affected but we will either have to go under cobra or I will have to go under Emily's insurance. We are still blessed and I see God's hands all over this. Now I don't have to worry about a deadline to return to work and can actually work on my health instead of worrying about the deadline. I actually feel sorry for the investigator though. It must be difficult to have to do what he does and I know I could not do it. But, even though he wasn't truthful with me I have already forgiven him and am moving on. My girls were so sweet as they saw daddy in a wheelchair. When I went to my doctor today I had a pretty good tremor and could have fallen but they got me in a wheel chair and the doctor says that I am still a fall risk and the tremors are obviously not going away. He also agreed that Parkinson's is a possibility and we should persue that. He also said as has my speech therapist said that conversion disorder can go on for quite a while. So, the bottom line is because I sold about 6 policies while on disability I lost my job today. But, I am still disabled and that has not changed so there is a lot going on.

But, we have our home. We have our family. We have our friends. Our children are healthy and we are loved so we remain blessed and God will take care of us. I have calmed down now and am resting and look forward to continuing to work in physical therapy and speech therapy to move forward. I always have my insurance license and was told that I could sell for colonial. So, once I am healthy and back on my feet I will really work hard on selling insurance and building my life back. I have a wonderful wife and our children are the lights of our lives. Our jobs are just a ways to a means. As long as we are together and love each other nothing else really matters.

So, a chapter in my life is over. I will miss all the wonderful people I met along the way and I will miss my job but God has something bigger and better in store for me. And, now, I can concentrate on getting better rather than a deadline. I thank you all for your continued prayers and concern and ask that you would pray for God's guidance to a new and better job and that his will in our lives would be met.