Today was counseling day. I went in thinking we were going to work on relaxing techniques with the upcoming investigator but instead I had a lot to talk about. To me, having the claim investigated is both an opportunity and an insult. Honor still matters to me and I have a reputation of being honest and that is very important to me. But, we never really worked on relaxing techniques instead we read scripture. Glenda listened to me and we prayed together. It is interesting that while I am worried because he could find against me while at the same time I have a sense of peace because I know the truth and I have the support of family and friends who have witnessed the tremors and how I have struggled with speech but they have not. I called the investigator to let him know that I know why he is coming. He seemed a bit off guard but he did say that there are some inconsistances in my claim but he would not say what they are and the only way to resolve them was face to face. I don't really know what they are but it really does not matter. I will just be open and honest and answer his questions to the best of my ability. One thing he did say was he wanted to come at 10 instead of 1 because of his schedule. I told him that was ok because I didn't want to frustrate him in anyway but it probably means Emily can't be here. I don't look forward to going through the interview alone because of my memory issues. But, if necessary, I will just call her or try to send a text while he is here to make sure I give correct answers.

So, I guess that is it. Nothing else major other than I once again woke with chest pain and had to take nitro. I am finding that when I have therapy and exert myself that seems to trigger the chest pain. But, my cardiologist has assured me that it is not life threatening so I just take my nitro and am learning to take it with me at all times.

I did tell the investigator that I am looking forward to meeting him and answering his questions and hopefully clearing this matter up one way or the other because the stress is not helping and it very well could set me back but that sense of peace that only believers have is reassuring. God is in control and he has my future and our family. We have been through so much this year and really the last two years that I just would love to get up and go to work and come home and walk without a walker and go swimming with my children and live life as it was prior to all of this. But, I can't go back the events of the past two years are here for a reason and I have learned from them and God willing we will go back to being a simple middle class family serving God and moving forward. I continue to ask for your prayers and support as we go through yet another trial. Oh, one more thing, he did tell me there is no exam or test just an interview kind of thing. So, I just do the best I can do and let God handle the rest.

So, tomorrow my girls come home and the house will once again be full of life and noise and little girls and honestly, I cant wait. My girls, and wife mean everything to me. They make my life full and worth living no matter what. As long as I have them nothing else really matters.